nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
you inspire me to be a worse person
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize
