i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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