Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
