CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Randomize
