Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
