You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Please don't give away my fajitas
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
