I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize
