She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
