their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
