She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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