I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
