Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
