I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
