i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
we made out on top of his cat.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Randomize
