I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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