i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
