marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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