i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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