So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
