saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize