My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
