WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
it glows. i had to have it.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
