I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
