just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
is that a dick in a sweater?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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