hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
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