i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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