That's intense
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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