Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize
