im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize