A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize