why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
