So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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