What a fucking waste of an outfit
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize