I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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