it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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