im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize