Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
