hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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