The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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