It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
