So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
