i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
