haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
