Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Everclear isn't food dammit
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Randomize
