no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
