yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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