i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize