Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I need to sanitize my soul.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
