come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
accomplished twins. life is a go
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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