I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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