I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
